To Be Feared Or To Be Loved?


Nicole Dabrowski, Contributor

Many of us have heard the question is it better to be feared or to be loved at some point in our lives.  Though hearing the question asked, and ruminating about the answer, is a different story. I’ve always found this question very interesting, because of the multitude of ways that it can be answered, depending on the person, and what they have gone through.

Perhaps one way to look for the answer to this question is to take a look into the past and some historical figures. During the era of kings and queens, power was vital for these royals in order to have the respect, and the authority they need to run their societies. However, for people now, what will bring us the things we want? To be feared means to demand respect and nothing short of it. To not tolerate being crossed, and to create a sense of fear to those around you. On the other hand, to be loved means to allow yourself to be vulnerable, to express your emotions and thoughts to others freely. I think in a perfect world, we would all choose to be loved, because who wouldn’t want to be cherished? Realistically speaking, however, if we want to protect ourselves from the many challenges that come with this world, we need to close ourselves off. To be feared is the safest option, but is it the best? Regardless of the vulnerability that comes with being loved, it opens the door for connecting with people on a deeper level, which I think is priceless.

If it doesn’t feel like you to close yourself off and hide, be vulnerable. As scary as it may sound in the end, it may bring you just what you need. So, the answer to the everlasting question, to be feared or to be loved lies in your hands. To answer it for yourself, ask yourself how you want to be remembered. Do you want to lead a safe, closed off life, or be fearless and take risks? As much as it makes sense to choose to be feared if there’s even the slightest voice in your head holding you back, listen to it. Chose love!